Hmm, it seems I’m not doing so well with this regular posting thing. The last time I tried blogging on a regular basis was years ago; I was younger and more interesting then and had more energy. Regardless, I’ll keep trying.

I do have good news though!

I am very, extremely, exceptionally, oh-my-god-I-could-lick-its-eyeball close to paying off my car. THAT’S SO EXCITING!! Then I’ll be able to redirect that money over to my remaining student loans and knock them out in another year or two. And then I’ll get to figure out a brand new, bigger way to go into debt! There are plenty of options out there, I’m sure.

I’m just kidding, probably. Maybe. Who knows what the future holds?

My financial management strategy basically consists of feeling horrible about being in debt to anyone, and throwing as much money as possible at the debt as quickly as possible. (Once upon a time, my parents kept a running tally of how much I owed them on the front of the refrigerator for all the world to see. Talk about demoralizing. But effective. Obviously!) This sense of shame is especially strong with credit cards. I feel like I have failed as an adult and a human being if I carry any balance at all over on one of my credit cards.

Sidenote: Your mileage may vary. We can’t and probably shouldn’t all be illogical in the same ways.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my credit cards. They’re so accessible and convenient. They give me points and I earn cashback, and there are way more protections built into them than if I were just wandering around waving a handful cash or my debit card. However, I don’t trust them. My total available credit at this point is only a little less than my annual income. (A well established credit history is one of the ways I know I’ve gotten old.) It’s too easy to pretend I have money when I don’t actually have money.

On the flip side, credit is certainly a godsend if something unexpected comes up. Hello, surgeries, vet bills, car repairs, replacement electronics, etc., I wasn’t planning to see you anytime soon! I actually recommend breaking into savings to pay off credit cards (related to emergency purchases, because that’s what emergency funds are for), if you’ve got a large enough savings to cushion that blow. In my case, the few times I’ve done it I was nowhere close to wiping out my savings. Ultimately, it was probably the more fiscally responsible move since the interest I owe on my credit card purchases is higher than the interest my savings account generates. World, you are so screwed up.

I am concerned about retirement though, which is yet another way I know I’ve gotten old. I don’t feel like I’ve done enough on that end of things because of my focus on eliminating current debt. Will I be comfortable? Will I even be able to retire? How long is my lifespan likely to be?

Big questions, no easy answers. It’s on my mind today a bit more than usual though, so I thought I’d share.